The 4-D Path to Victory
by Sam and Debbie Bowman
D# 1 – Devastation
The journey begins at the beginning. Devastation happens. When Zachary died it was like being T-Boned by a Mac truck. One day you’re off on your journey toward your dream destination thinking about all the wonderful things that lay ahead and the excitement of arriving at that coveted destination: retirement, ease, relaxation, time for that special activity you have wanted to take up all your life. Then BAM! You get T-Boned by your kids. The worst possible happens, a child dies, and the next day you find yourself snuggling in bed next to a baby, that’s yours to take care of, forever. Perhaps your child hasn’t died, but you can lose them to drugs, to the dropout life, to addictions. Devastation comes in all forms.
Devastation takes a toll on every part of your life: mind, emotions, will, strength, energy, motivation, relationships, and money. But, you’re still alive, so you have to keep going. What do you do when you don’t know what to do? You keep going. When you’re going through hell – keep going!
D# 2 – Declaration
When devastation hits you have to keep going. You just put one foot in front of the other. Declaration means you also begin to put one word in front of the other.
First, use words to make a list and thereby verbalize what you need to do and where you need to go. See what needs to be done right now and move on it. Use words to make a to-do list:
- Call an attorney
- Make funeral plans
- Change a diaper
- Call family
- Brush my teeth
- Whatever else you need to do today.
Second, use words to put your heart into a journal. Tell it like it really is. Put down today’s date and record the facts of what’s happened and what’s going on. Then write your thoughts, observations, feelings, questions. Hold nothing back! Make journaling a prayer. Writing words helps you find the words you need to speak in order to get good things done in the middle of disaster.
Third, use words to declare a positive destination with determination and authority;
- “I will get through this.”
- “This will not kill me.”
- “I can do this.”
- “There are answers I don’t yet see.”
- “I will be happy again.”
- “I am a survivor.”
- “No weapon formed against me will prosper”
Fourth, talk to your problem and make your words a prayer:
- “Problem, you will not win!”
- “Satan, you may have won the battle, but you lose the war!”
- “Bank account, you will sustain me”
- “Devastation, you are not permanent, I will rebuild”
Fifth, stand in front of a mirror and talk to yourself. Taking to yourself is not insanity. Doing nothing is insanity, so say with determination:
- “John, you can do this.”
- “Sally, you are strong.”
- “Amanda, you are a winner.”
- “I am a woman of God and a woman of action and I will do whatever I need to do to take care of my family.”
D# 3 – Dedication
Once you have set the words, you have to set your mind that you are totally dedicated to creating a positive outcome. Sell out. Come hell or high water, you are going to get through this and make the best of a bad situation. According to Romans 8:28 its not over until its all good! Sacrifice and discipline are words that made the greatest generation so great. We need to bring them out again and put them into action. Determine that you are going to stay the course. When the going gets tough the tough get going and, with God’s help, they keep going until things are made good again.
D# 4 – Destination
Keep your destination in your minds eye. Visualize it. God gave you a left brain to organize the facts and to make to-do lists and he gave you a right brain so that you could visualize the destination. See your family whole, healthy and happy. See things coming back to center, calming down and getting into order. See the house organized, the kids laughing and playing. See your life productive, full of joy, peace and contentment. Your best decisions will be made when you use both brain sides; left factual/logical and right intuitive/creative.
Whatever you used to think would make you happy, get a new happy. Happy doesn’t come because you get what you want, it comes because somewhere deep inside you find the strength and courage to change your focus, to change what makes you happy, to make happy out of what you have, and you will!
Download this article: 4-D Path to Victory
Sam and Debbie Bowman live on their mini-farm in Indiana with their grandson Anthony and dog Zoey. They are authors of six children’s videos, Because Granpa Says So, That’s Why: Laugh and Learn with Granpa Cratchet and The Summer of Paintless Toenails: helping grandparents raise a generation of whole, healthy and happy grandchildren. Follow them on at awesomegrandmothers.org, and runfortheprize.com